Clutching Stars

Published January 13, 2014 by Amy Elizabeth

Despite the fact that people tell you they love you, 
You’re backed up behind a vale.
You’re clenching the stars so tight in your hands,
That even their light threatens to extinguish. 
And you’ve finally suffocated 
Under the weight of the doubt that has constantly tried to drown you.

Because everyone’s eyes are windows,
And their minds are made up of wrecking balls that consist of judgement,
That swing into your walls 
In a vain but whole hearted attempt to break them down.
And piece by piece,
Chunk by chunk,
They forge deeper cracks
Into what feels like forever.

But you can’t deny the pain
When it smacks you across the face,
Leaving a hand shaped mark 
That contains every single finger of blame
You’ve ever had pointed your way.
Because with every word that created a scratch,
Every snicker that wound up in a bruise,
Every night that turned into day
Before the monsters clocked off to get paid,
You found yourself falling deeper into forever. 

Alive.
But not really living.
So You reach to take the hand that extends itself through the crowd,
like it’s a rendition
Of your favourite song 
that breaks out of your headphones and into your heart 
because it’s coming to give you a hug. 
To let you know that everything’s okay.
To hold you through the nights
When just a simple touch would spark your nerve endings enough 
to stop you from shooting yourself in the head 
with a bullet that was made of gold dust.

Every wall you put up,
Is several feet thicker when you try to break it down.
So be prepared.
Be vigilant.

Be wary.
Be strong.
Be confident.
Be considerate.
Be the light that the sun cowers away from because it’s scared of the power you posses.
Play havoc with the monsters that live under your bed,
Because you’re the one who’s in charge. 

Not them.

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